Let me tell you something about parenthood and snacks: anything that doesn’t leave sticky handprints on my walls or require a full hazmat cleanup is already winning. Enter Trader Joe’s freeze-dried watermelon slices, a snack so bizarrely engineered it feels like some kind of parental miracle.
These aren’t the sticky, drippy watermelon slices that transform your toddler into a juice-covered crime scene. No, these are crisp, chip-like wafers that shatter like a tortilla chip’s delicate cousin, with zero potential for clothing destruction.
The ingredient list is shorter than my kids’ attention span: just watermelon, dried to a crisp perfection. No added sugar, just the fruit’s natural sweetness, which, fair warning, is sweeter than my children’s manipulation tactics during bedtime negotiations.
Some slices even have seeds, adding a tiny bitter note that feels like a metaphorical wink to parents who know life isn’t always sweet. At $2.99 a bag, it’s basically a cheap therapy session, cheaper than the cleaners I’d need after traditional watermelon snack time.
Five Ways To Use Crispy Dried Watermelon Slices
- Cocktail Garnish Extraordinaire Crush these crispy slices and rim a glass for a summery margarita or mojito. The natural sweetness and unique texture would add a unexpected twist to your drink presentation. It’s like a fancy garnish that’s part decoration, part edible conversation starter.
- Fancy Salad Crouton Replacement Crumble the dried watermelon slices over a summer salad for a sweet, crispy alternative to traditional croutons. Imagine a spinach salad with goat cheese and these watermelon “croutons”, it’s the kind of unexpected culinary move that’ll make you feel like a Food Network star in your own kitchen.
- Unconventional Ice Cream Topping Break these crispy slices into small pieces and sprinkle them over vanilla ice cream or frozen yogurt. The contrast between the cold, creamy dessert and the crunchy, sweet watermelon pieces could create a surprisingly delightful texture combination.
- Pantry Percussion Instrument For parents or music enthusiasts, these crispy slices could become an impromptu musical instrument. Carefully crush them in different ways to create unique crackling sounds – instant homemade sound effects or a way to entertain kids with “food music.”
- Cake/Cupcake Decorative Topping Use whole or crushed dried watermelon slices as a unique cake or cupcake decoration. They could add an unexpected burst of color and texture to desserts, especially for summer-themed birthday parties or events where you want to showcase a creative culinary twist.
Final Thoughts
Would I buy them again? Probably not. Be But for one glorious moment, I found a snack that entertains the kids, doesn’t destroy my kitchen, and provides a momentary illusion of healthy eating. They are $3 for a 150 calorie snack that will be gone in seconds. I really liked them but felt like I would like a whole large bag of them instead of this small bag that weighs in at 1.41 ounces or 40 grams. But if I leave out the fact that it’s a small amount, they are 9 stars out of 10 on flavor and enjoyability!
